You always hear that kids don’t come with instruction manuals…I totally get that. But no one ever said the game ends at the age of 10!! I always thought you had years to teach and train your kids—heck, at 10 we haven’t even gotten within a mile of the “BIG” stuff, and it’s over already!
I have a 10 year old, well as of a few weeks ago I guess I have a 10 1/2 year old boy. This child has been a ‘handful’ (being diplomatic) since he was about 3 days old. I had a wonderful recess period with him from about 5 weeks old until the day his little brother was born 2 years later. We were alone together in Utah while my husband worked in Arizona. We were best buddies–he really loved me then. Now…not so much!
In my last LONG post, I mentioned just a few of the things he says to me on a daily basis. Really mean, unloving things. In that post, I said that I knew they weren’t his true feelings, he’s just acting out and this is the only way he knows how. But I have to say, I’m starting to doubt my own words. This boy really doesn’t like me. Disdain to the point that there is nothing I can say sweetly or otherwise to break through this exterior that he has put up. I wish my dad was here to give him a blessing…that might be about the only thing to help him. He’s out of control and he’s 10! I can’t even imagine what he’ll be like at 14!
I’ve been trying to just ignore him when he gets in his little “Mom is the Devil” mode–I used to feed into it and we would get into these bouts that ended with me or him saying something awful. So I stopped. I turn and walk away–yes, this sets him off a bit more, but it can also get the house back to peaceful a whole lot quicker than anything else. There isn’t much in the world the boy cares about, so there isn’t much to take away. He’s currently lost his beloved PS2, Guitar Hero, the Wii and any chance of playing on my computer. The only two things he has left are his bike and his Cello, and I won’t let myself take either one of these away. The main problem is his attitude is spilling over onto his 3 other siblings. Yesterday was so bad I actually stopped at The Olive Garden to get ME a treat. I got a container of Calamari to go. Boy did I hear about it when no one else got any. (Side note…NEVER eat an entire container of Calamari by yourself…oooooh the acid stomach!!)
We are getting darn near bankrupt–and I’m seriously looking at draining the account and finding a summer camp for them all, not that any of them deserve it, but I’m thinking it will end up cheaper than me in a straight jacket in the looney bin after my mental breakdown!! Come September we have to have our mortgage re-financed or a huge balloon payment is due. Sadly, even with the huge down payment we put on the house, with so many people losing theirs we don’t qualify for any refinances. So…….if we do indeed end up needing to move…I’m going home. Illinois has not been friendly to ME. I have ZERO support here, and my husband can do what he does anywhere, so why not in Utah. Even if he doesn’t want to go, I would rather live in a little apartment in Utah, working full time–than staying here in this over taxed, fiscally stupid state! Not that my kids would behave better anywhere–I would just rather live poor in Utah, than live poor here. So keep your fingers crossed—D-day is September 1st!
Wow, after re-reading that…So much stress…So little sanity to deal with it all!!
